| All my life I have been haunted by God." I remember the first time I heard my friend Lisa Wagner say those words. It was during her one-woman play about the life of Dorothy Day, and it exploded within me: I too had been haunted by God. As a small child I felt a mysteri- ous, passionate longing for the Divine. I thought mysti- cal experiences were natural, that everyone was havingthem, and because my roots were deeply embedded inmy Catholic upbringing, it Seemed I had but one re-course. A month after graduating from high school Ijoined a monastery. I would become a priest and devotemy life to prayer and silence, seeking some sort of mys-tical union with my Beloved. I had dreamed of that dayfor many years, and when the huge iron gate closed be-hind me I knew I had crossed over to a new world. But the ~npty stillness of the ancient rituals echoedwithin me and left me cold. Whatever it was I wassearching for, I wasn t going to find it in the magic for-mulas and dogmatic insistence of any institution. I hadto leave, to search on my own. I was like Siddharthaw |
商品评论(0条)