CHAPTER 1 Incest: If You Think the Word Is Ugly... BEGINTHIS BOOK by defining incest, not in technical terms (that definition is provided in Chapter 2) but graphically and through the eyes of a victim. This portrayal is a composite- incest is very complex and has many different patterns of occurrence. To understand the incest survivor, it is absolutely essential to understand what she experienced and to see it from her perspective. The clinician must know what to expect about the experi- \"~ ence and how ugly it can be. The reality of incest is infants, babies, little girls, preadolescents and adolescents lying in their cribs and beds in fear. They become hyperat- tuned to footsteps, creaking stairs, breathing, and the light that appears around a bedroom door when it is opened at night. They are aware of being watched, usually quietly, obsessively, and with lustful eyes. Sometimes all the bed and stares. Sometimes he breathes heavily, rapidly, moans a little that happens is that he stands at the door or just inside the door or sits on and then goes away. \" At other times, he touches her. He usually begins gently and talks softly as he rubs her body. He does this when he tucks her in at night after wishing her sweet dreams or later when she awakens to find him back in her bedroom, touching.., feeling.., and kissing her. He tells her it s their little secret and to not tell anyone for telling will spoil it. She knows it feels good but doesn t understand the not telling anyone part. She begins to wonder Then she awakens to find his hands up her nightgown or down her pajamas, rubbing her breasts, her thighs and buttocks, and \"down there: Thhiis. chapter title is adapted from an article by Myers (n.d.) entitled \"Incest: If you nmk the word is ugly, take a look at its effects.\"
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